Dear fellow Mummies,
'You can only love your children as much as you love yourself'.
I came across this quote while preparing for an online self love webinar that I was hosting last month. This is a truly profound statement that many of us mothers have never really considered. I am sure that I am not alone when I say that I believe that our West Indian culture does not truly foster the idea of self love especially for mothers. As mothers we are many times made to feel guilty if we choose to take time for ourselves.
I can't tell you how many times that I have been told, "You are a mother now, your children have to be your priority."
Loving and sacrificing for our children come naturally as mothers most times, yet loving ourselves and showing ourselves the care and attention we also deserve takes a bit more effort. The reality is that as a mother if you do not make self care a priority, you become a mother who is irritable, angry and exhausted. How then can you give your children the attention, patience and care that they need?
Self care as a mother can be done in different ways. It can be as simple as taking some time for a daily practice, joining an exercise class, you can meet up with friends to relax. Another really important method self care is protecting your energetic space. This can mean actively choosing to remove yourself from the energy of persons who may bring you down or who don't truly support you in your journey through motherhood.
I believe that it is also important to remember that as mothers, we do not lose our authentic identity. Being a mother is a crucial role that we play in the lives of other souls, however it does not take away from the fact that we are still individuals with needs, desires and dreams. This therefore means that showing love and attention to your authentic self is paramount for being a happy and fulfilled woman and this of course benefits your children.
Make the time for some guilt-free self love on a regular basis and I promise you...your kids will thank you!!!
My name is Mariessa Newallo, I am a 25 year old mother of two toddlers: Azariah and Malachi. Life hit me a huge curveball at 21 when I became a mother while studying Political Science and Communications at university in Spain. Since then I’ve used my experiences and struggles as a woman to create a company ‘Think Elysian’ (@think.elysiantt) that’s all about promoting feminism in Trinidad and Tobago. I also run an instagram blog @trinimomblogger which is just a hobby at the moment where I share advice and experiences as a mother. I’m excited to continue along this journey of motherhood and Im grateful for the opportunity to share my thoughts with you.